We ordered our food and waited as it was being prepared. My hopes that she would be a speedy eater were low to begin with, she looked like someone who chewed. The food came but she hadn’t left. So I screwed up my gumption and headed over to ask her to move. There were lots of other tables available but I still hated asking her. She responded with a quick apology and a quick move.
But why …
… do I feel that she gave me something that I need to be grateful to her for?
… do I feel that I intruded into her lunch and was a bother to her?
… do I feel that I do not have as much right to space that is designated for me and those like me as she does for her and people like her.
… do I feel like my ‘ask’ could have been acceptably turned down?
Being disabled, for me, is sometimes just too complex and I have yet to come to terms with my right to space and my right for appropriate accommodation And it’s been over ten years!
Will I ever get it?