No Apologies

There were a few moments yesterday where I felt that it’s all going to be okay. I hadn’t felt that for a couple of weeks and it was a relief. One day this week I was making veggies and eggs for breakfast, something I’ve done a lot and suddenly, I was overwhelmed and couldn’t think of what to do next. It was that point that I realized that I needed to create some space that didn’t have pressures from work, either job, or the mountain of writing I have to do. I need to breathe.

Taking care of oneself isn’t something that comes easily to many of us. There are other needs, more important needs, that take precedent. Then things get shoved aside, for the first time since I started going I haven’t gone to the gym for two weeks, haven’t done that at home exercises either. Too tired, too stressed, too much stuff I have to do in the evening.

I don’t burn out, I wear down.

And that’s what I need to deal with now. In two weeks I’ve not only not been to the gym, I haven’t been out at all. Home, work, home, work, home … two weeks.

I’m going to the gym today.

I’m going grocery shopping.

I’m going to the mall.

I’m going to the movies.

All this weekend. I’m filling it with stuff I like to do. I can’t fight for community living and lose the experience of it at the same time.

So bring on the weekend.

Take away the stress.

If you are there, at a spot of being burned out, worn down, or run ragged … take a breath. Join me. Make this weekend about you, apologetically.